Mark Twain Hotel - Can you say CLASSY?!

I don't agree with former Peoria Mayor Bud Grieves that our fair City is in desperate need of a museum, and I thought he was way off his rocker when he told City Council that $220 million was not too much to pay to buy the water company, but I will give him this...

THE MARK TWAIN HOTEL ROCKS!!!

Bud owns and runs a very nice place. Polly is staying here tonight because I had my hardwood floors refinished and while they look beautiful, my house smells like Love Canal. I got a migraine the moment I turned my key in the door lock. I swear, there has got to be plutonium or something equally toxic in the varnish they used.

It was too late at night to annoy friends, and since watching the t.v. ads lately, I was curious about the Twain. Can I tell you?! Very nice. Don't be fooled by the Hotel's exterior. I think the outside of the Hotel is well described as "Grey Poupon Mustard Yellow". My sister, who can be quite crass at times, calls it "Breast Fed Baby Crap Yellow." Worry not, better taste prevailed in the interior. My room is a gentle, muted, relaxing shade of Martha Stewart Green. The rooms are huge, metropolitan in decor, the shower is amazing- it has one of those huge rain showerheads- very sexy. I would wager that the sheets have a 1000 thread count and the bed is incredibly plush and cozy. Swank television with surround sound. Plus, FREE IN ROOM WI-FI!!! No key code needed. Two desks, nice size, and lots of cubbies so you don't have to trip over luggage. The price, $132 a night, includes four coupons for free cocktails, and breakfast in the morning. Bud didn't skimp on the in-room coffee either. Seattle's Best. There are even heavy white robes with the Mark Twain logos!

Mark Twain is pricey for Peoria, but better than any other hotel in the area I've seen, including the Courtyard Marriott. It blows the Pere out the water. The Pere is dingy and smells moldy in my opinion. My room at Mark Twain has an amazing view of the bridge. If anyone is looking to impress out of town clients or the in laws, this is the place. In fact, the Mark Twain is worthy of a wedding anniversary or prom night celebration. I have easy spent two times as much at crappier hotels in Chicago. The Mark Twain has the Downtown Chicago Sheraton beaten by a long shot.

My only gripe: Bud, Honey, you should have invested in better windows. The windows here suck! Saran Wrap would provide better noise reduction. Every siren, every moron motorist blasting rap sound as if they are in the room, not outside and eight floors below. When airplanes pass overhead, one momentarily fears that the hotel is located on the runway. Not an exaggeration- I can hear the high heels of bar hopping females clicking on the sidewalk. No problem. I plan on blasting the air conditioning (also loud) to muffle the noise.

Nonetheless this is a very nice place, and since Peoria is all but dead by midnight on Thursdays, I'm not too uptight about the cheap windows. I should be able to log six good hours of sleep.

Night night!