Many of you have a three day weekend. If you are parents of a teenager or even a tweenager, consider the extra time an opportunity for a talk. Please tell your kids that you love them dearly. Tell them that even if they flunk every last class in school, get pregnant (or someone else pregnant), pose nude on the internet, and get a DUI all in the same week that you will still love them and you will forgive them.
By all means tell them that you will be pissed. Tell them you will be pissed and disappointed and hurt, but as a parent and an adult, after you are done yelling and having a good cry, you will proceed digging the child you love dearly out the hole they dug for themselves. That's what parents do. That's the job.
Tell your kid the truth. Tell them that at one time or another we all screw up in huge, fantastic, incredible, unbelievable ways. As humans, major errors are unavoidable.
Tell your teenager that you recognize their ability to fall in love. Tell them that when someone you love abandons you, it hurts like hell. DON'T TELL THEM THERE ARE MORE FISH IN THE SEA - even if it is true. Tell them that the pain they feel is important and real and it will take awhile to subside.
Tell them the only thing most never get over or recover from is losing a child.
Your child.
2 comments:
Good advice
Amen, Rob. I didn't go to my parents when I screwed up as a teen because I was afraid I'd get in trouble or they just wouldn't understand. I wish my folks had said, "Yes, we will be angry if you do something irresponsible and stupid, but we love you and we will always help you if you do screw up."
Teens need to know that you will still love and help them after you are done grounding them for life.
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